Hello everyone, happy 2016! It's crazy to think that we're closer to 2030 than we are to 2000. It's also crazy to think that I am typing this with one hand and with the other digging through my backpack trying to find that crushed M&M I was saving for dinner. #talent I don't have to explain myself, love me as I am.
ALLLLLLLLright, this January was absolutely incredible. January, in my opinion is usually the worst month. Here in DC, January is frigid and dark. There's ice everywhere that wants to kill you, everyone's lips are chapped, and the only remotely exciting holiday is MLK jr. Day *kisses fist and points to heaven with glimmer in my eye*.
2015 - MONTAGE IS HERE [click]
Although January didn't suck and I have so many activities to write about, I did have trouble writing this blog post. I am currently suffering from a serious condition called "the writers block" and it's a period of time when a self-proclaimed comedic prodigy (such as myself) couldn't type a complete sentence if my life depended on it.
In order to try and get some inspiration, I decided to attend my university's spring comedy show, starring Streeter Seidell (SNL writer), Mike Birbiglia (actor and stand-up) & Vanessa Bayer (the jewish boy on Weekend Update on SNL, also other things but I like that the best). I won a ticket via twitter to sit front row and then meet them after the show.
The show was hilarious, every act had me in tears. Afterwards, I shuffled my way to the side of the basketball court turned comedy club and clustered in with the 6 other lucky SNL geek winners. We huddled there together staring at our phones brainstorming life-altering questions to ask them. "Which adult do you resent the most from your formative years?" or "Do you do comedy as a way of self-expressing your innate need for attention-seeking?" or "Do you have Tina Fey's number in your phone?"
Before I went to the show, I asked my brother if he had any good suggestions for a good question to ask the comedians. He suggested ask them a question about themselves. Naturally, I didn't do this and instead decided to use this maybe one-in-a lifetime opportunity (hopefully not, I'm coming for you NBC) to ask for advice and help. I did this for YOU, BLOG.
[When we walked into the green room the first thing I noticed was the crafty table with about 300,00,000010 water bottles on it. Okay, I know their talent requires a lot of hydration, but why do green rooms always have an excessive amount of snacks and liquids? When I become famous, will I have a delegated water-bottle man who makes sure I always have way too many fiji water bottles? Is there anyway I can get an advance on this perk? LMK. ]
When we walked in we got some group photos and then I went up to Mike and asked him the money question: "How can, do I, I get be funnier?" He looked at me like I was a flustered grey-haired 20-year-old asking him a stupid question and all he wanted to was get on the train back to NYC.
"Keep writing" He said.
So here I am, taking your advice, Mike (we're on a first name basis after my next question in which he opened up to me about his deep-rooted childhood issues of not being accepted). It was weird, then he, Vanessa and Streeter invited me to join the cast of SNL (because he's in charge of that) and then he just handed me $5,000 cash. I thought it was a little much, but he insisted.
Will You Accept This Carnation?
OK SO PROUD OF THAT TITLE.
Becaaaaause, I'm going to talk about two of the most intense things that happened this January: sorority recruitment and the Bachelor premiere.
Whilst these two things sound mostly unrelated (except for the common denominator that sustains both: basic college women), they actually have pretty similar processes.
Can we talk about how unnatural it is to put a bunch of women in one place for any extended period of time? When has that ever worked out okay? Fun fact: in DC, we can't have sorority houses because anytime there is an official household full of women, it is considered a brothel. This is an old DC law that we've been trying to get overruled, but maybe the founding fathers knew what they were talking about.
Both of these processes involve a lot of judging and a lot of feels. If you don't come out of that limo in a gorgeous dress and give Ben Higgins a hug so good that first impression rose gives itself to you, consider yourself a disgrace. Similarly, if you don't walk into a room full of 80+ girls ready to judge you and agree that you're 'flawless, hilarious, beautiful, smart and kind with a really great passion for philanthropy and has an internship but likes to party' by a 5-minute conversation, you're a mastermind. When I went through recruitment, I was a frizzy potato lump with damaged cuticles and uneven eyeliner. Now I'm a grey-haired potato lump with a manicure and have sister-friends do my eyeliner #WAaaaayUP #lookatmeNOW #blessed
Anyway, recruitment is over now and we have a great new member class in which all the girls are cool, cultured and have chic instagram accounts so I've got that going for me. Who knows? Maybe by this time next year, I'll have an "aesthetic"!!!!!
PS - what does "fam" and "lit" mean? I know these have been around for a while, but I just recently mustered up the lack of dignity to ask. Are they office appropriate words? Will they make me cooler. Let me know, thanks in advance.
Anyone living in the DMV area knows that this winter has been a cruel joke. It was 75 degrees on Christmas and just as climate change deniers started to sit back down, SNOWZILLA HAPPENED.
Before the great storm arrived, DC went insane. It declared a state of emergency like 3 days beforehand and I decided to get out of the city and drive up to Baltimore where my manfriend goes to school.
So I'm making my way up route 95 and you'd think it's already blizzarding by the way people are driving. Honda Civics are going 80mph, swerving around each other. All common highway courtesy is gone. Everyone must get to Giant right NOW and buy all the Stouffers frozen lasagnas or they WILL die.
I was expecting to get snowed in for a couple of days, hang with the hipsters, take some high-contrast snow photos for my photography homework.
Before I know it, it's day 4 and my car is still blanketed in snow. Every Parks & Rec episode has been watched, and all my manfriend's frozen PF Changs meals have been consumed by me. Now, I'd like to act like after 5 days of doing absolutely nothing but eating, watching TV and rolling around in the snow I would be bored and ready to get back to work. I'd really like to say that's true. But honestly I could lay in bed and watch movies and tv for the rest of my life and I have no shame, this is a safe space.
I live in the District now
I've been commuting for a year and finally decided to move into an apartment closer to school. Although moving 30 minutes away isn't that big of a deal for me, I think it's a different story for Wallet & Worry. For those of you who aren't avid stalkers of my blog, welcome. Also, Wallet & Worry are universal nicknames for my parents, feel free to assume which is which. For the first time is 32 years, our household is truly an empty nest. I would like to think they are keeping themselves busy, but I'm not sure how they're holding up.
For example, I went home the other day and didn't tell anyone I was coming. When I walked in I heard my mother singing so I followed her voice upstairs and saw her cradling our dog Gatsby by the fireplace. Ruby was asleep in the bed, tucked in watching Dogs 101 on Animal Planet. She looked back as I entered the room; I backed out slowly and we haven't talked about it since. My dad works downtown still, so he has an outside distraction from the empty house. But I can still tell he's holding back his massive urge to "dad". This morning he send me a detailed email about how to upkeep my car, including fixing my tire pressure issues for the cold months and how often I need to replace my wiper blades. Long emails about "adulting" is his version of coddling my dogs.
No but really, living in DC has been amazing. I have cooler places to do homework, I can go to the grocery store and eat whATeVER I WANT WHEN I WANT, MOM, #icecream4breakfast, and I have a cozy little apartment with two amazing roommates.
Last but not least, Animal Planet
I started my internship!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
I have lived in Silver Spring, MD my entire life. I live about 3 miles away from the MD/DC border and something I pass every time I drive to DC (aka every day) is the Discovery Communications headquarters. Why are they in Silver Spring? I don't know. All I know is that I have been staring at that building since I was a wee-little budding baby blog writer, dreaming of working inside of the giant shark (see: shark week discovery channel building).
For those of you who don't know, Discovery owns so much--you don't even know, Discovery owns YOU. But really, Discovery Communications includes TLC, OWN (Oprah's Network), I.D., Science Channel, Velocity, Destination America, Animal Planet and, of course, Discovery Channel.
This building houses all the magic that makes up those channels and many more. I walked into Animal Planet on my first day, post snow-pocalypse, and was welcomed with an open workspace filled with pictures of animals.
I'm working in the Digital Media department which means they manage and run all the social media and web stuff, but also work very closely with Marketing and Communications departments. On my first day, I literally got paid to watch archived videos of PUPPIES and SLOTHS and post them to Facebook. I got paid to do what your 53-year-old Aunt Sally does 45 times a day anyway.
I started a little bit earlier than the other interns -- they asked me to come in early because they "need more help with Puppy Bowl" - what is life. But the people I've met so far are so talented and great and love animals which makes them A+ in my book anyway.
But......I have some bad news......
As it turns out, I cannot bring Gatsby into work with me. The building doesn't permit animals. I tried to level with them and explain how Gatsby is not an animal, he's clearly in his own category of species. He's also really famous on Instagram and a renown social media specialist so...
WELL, THAT'S ALL FOR NOW, folks.
Thanks for getting this far. Make sure you follow/like Animal Planet on Facebook, Twitter, Instagram, etc. to see all the cute/amazing/wowtastic videos/blogs/pics I will be posting.
& TUNE IN for Puppy Bowl Feb 7 right before the Super Bowl! Pregame to puppies. It's the new cool thing to do *~
See you in February. HAPPY CAUCUSSING #trump2016 #trump2020 #TrumpGatsby2016
Welcome to 2016!
Hello my lovely little chicken nuggets. And happy sweet 16 to all children born in the year 2000. Kids who were born the year 9/11 happened are freshman in high school. McDonalds is serving all day breakfast. What is happening to this world?
Santa Isn't Real...
...& being the youngest of 6 sucks.
Over break I was hanging out with my friends* and they were discussing when they stopped believing in Santa Claus. One of my friends joked "wait, you guys stopped believing?" HAHA he still believes, that's funny because we're old now and believing in anything is stupid. Hope is dead. But then I said "wait, you guys actually believed in Santa?" And they laughed** but I wasn't kidding. I never actually got the chance to believe. I envied the children around me as I kept the secret inside me.
I remember one Christmas Eve when I was about 6, I was watching A Christmas Story with my older brother Casey. With a twinkle in my eye and christmas spirit flooding my heart, I expressed my excitement for Santa to come that night and deliver my one big gift (no way did my parents let an old fat man take credit for all our presents). I knew at this point that he wasn't real, I always knew, but it was still fun to try and be normal. Casey spouted, "Erin, Santa ISN'T REAL, you should know that. You're stupid and dumb." Keep in mind Casey was 8. Little devil child.
That night I lay in my bed and peered through the crack in my curtains, hoping to see a red sleigh. As the drama queen I was as a child, I hoped that Santa was maybe real and all my siblings were just a bund of grinches. Of course I knew he was a fallacy, there were so many illogical things that you had to accept before believing in Santa.
* = people who hang out with me because I make amazing dip
** = didn't laugh except for my mom, she laughs everything I say hi mom
Flashback to me, a 9-year-old on the playground explaining improbabilities to my recess gang,
Let's take a big fat man who lives in... the "North Pole" - the coldest and most desolate place on Earth. Let's make him jolly and ancient, living on a diet of cookies and milk and not getting diabetes. BUT WAIT, let's add a army of mutant mini-humans that will work day and night as his slaves. They produce name-brand toys for children (no copy-right infringement there!) and give them away for free, receiving no profit (economically-sound business model!). OKAY, to make it a little more unrealistic and hard for young children to wrap their minds around, let's take animals that have NO chance of naturally flying (Reindeer) and make them fly around the world to every single house in ONE night. One of these reindeer will have a RED nose that lights up like a lighthouse. Then, to really challenge the children's sense of hope, let's make Santa have to squeeze his fat, blubbery torso down their chimney and leave present by present under their tree. What's that? It seems to wholesome and believable? Okay, let's make this fat old man omniscient and omnipresent so all the other 364 days of the year he can watch your child doing "bad" and "good" things and judge them accordingly. Now your children will HAVE to believe in Santa not only through their blatant, innocent sense of hope (that will one day be shattered) but also their sense of impending doom if Santa judges them as a "bad" kid."
...I was much too logical as a child to believe this.
Snapchat is a soul-sucking app.
Around Thanksgiving, I decided to get rid of Snapchat. I've had the app since high school. For those of you don't know, Snapchat is a social media app that allows you to send pictures to your friends and the pictures will disappear "forever" in seconds. You can also make a "story" that all your friends can see that also disappears in 24 hours. Theres also filters that you can put on your pictures and "Geotags" to let your friends know where you are.
When I deleted Snapchat, I literally saw the light.
Don't get me wrong, I'm a marketing minor, lover of social media and everything millennial. I think Twitter is an incredibly powerful and fun tool when used correctly and Instagram can be very useful as an artistic outlet and for sharing ideas. Facebook is an awesome way to connect your community and keep in touch with family and friends. But Snapchat is pointless and makes people live life less.
HERE'S WHY YOU SHOULD GET RID OF SNAPCHAT LIKE I DID:
1. You know how people 40+ are always complaining about how "kids are always looking at their phones" "no one actually lives anymore" "young people don't actually talk to each other anymore" "social media is ridiculous". We as young people tend to disregard this because we still hang out with friends plenty and still have authentic adventures. We just happen to be more connected, safer and post more flattering pictures now. HOWEVER, they are TOTALLY right when it comes to Snapchat. Every time I hang out with a friend who still has Snapchat they never put their phone down. ANYTHING cool that we do must go on their "story" or sent to someone. Stop living your life to impress other people. While you're taking that 2 second photo that maybe 50 people will look at and never think about again, you are missing the moment! I USED TO BE THIS PERSON. REPENT - ok sorry a little intense I'm just very passionate.
2. Snapchat takes horrible, horrible pictures. Not only are they low quality and that weird dimension, but the filters suck. Ever since I got rid of Snapchat I've been taking real photos with my nice DSLR, GOPro or iPhone camera (which is amazing!). Sometimes you only have 1 second to capture that perfect moment in a photo, don't waste it on a low-resolution compressed Snapchat photo.
3. Snapchat makes you depressed. It's already tough looking at all the people doing amazing things on Facebook and Instagram, why do you need another medium to make you feel bad about yourself? Snapchat gave me the worst case of FOMO (fear of missing out). I would be in the library all night and watch one of my friends stories which would have them all dressed up and going out. But then the next day I would be all dressed up and going out and probably making someone else feel bad.
4. Shouldn't Instagram, Twitter, Facebook, Groupme, Yik Yak, Netflix, Tinder, texting, Vine, Tumblr etc. be enough? I don't know about you guys, but I spend a lot of time looking at my phone everyday. As a visual person, Instagram is fun to look at. Twitter is great for keeping up with the news and pop culture and Facebook is how I stay in touch with people. That's already a lot to juggle and I found myself looking at Snapchat the most somedays which is just unhealthy. If you get rid of Snapchat you will be AMAZED at all the free time you have. I literally get out of bed earlier because I have one app less to check. Snapchat is like celery, it has 0 nutritional value. It won't help you learn, it's purely for your entertainment. It's a waste of time.
5. It's always in the back of your mind. When I had Snapchat and something cool would happen I would immediately think "this would be great to put on my story!" NO. This is not how to live life. Sorry but, no one cares about your "story" and no one really cares about your snapchats. If your'e sending something funny to a friend in particular for a specific reason, by all means keep your Snapchat. But I don't have that discipline. Snapchat is messy, fleeting and reckless. There was no curation, thought or reason put into any of my snaps and I wold miss out on life while worrying about a stupid social media app.
If you're an addict, I challenge you to get rid of it for one week and you'll see the light.
"It's a shakedown cruise!" my dad yells over the sound of an unstable 8-seater propeller plane. In November, my dad said he wanted to go to the Bahamas with my mom. He expressed that they would probably get bored if they went alone, so he invited us purely for entertainment. My brother Brock, sister Carli, brother James and his girlfriend Gen and my other sisterfriend Nurit joined us. I planned the trip knowing nothing about the Bahamas except that I wanted to avoid the touristy spots. After MUCH Tripadvisoring, we settled on a place called Treasure Cay in North Abaco, the north-east islands of the Bahamas. Treasure Cay was a great place to stay. It was exclusive and remote, but there was still a wonderful community of locals and tourists. They had a stunning beach and two great bars. We played a lot of beach volleyball, picked coconuts and drank the water and made some great meals in our villa. I would write more about it but it physically hurts to think about being back in the 30 degree weather of DC. So instead enjoy some photos. Montage to come soon!
Have a great first month of the new year! Stick to that new healthy lifestyle! Keep going to the gym! Adopt a puppy! Donate clothing! Go to Seaworld, light someone's kitchen on fire.
Hello my lovely little nuggets,
We're almost there, the end of the year. If you are a real working adult reading this at work, I hope you're having a great day, thanks for the support. If you are a grimy, homeless adult, I would like to know more about you and how you found my blog. Also, I would like to hang out sometime. However, if you are a fellow college student drowning in exam-week work, please delete this tab, and your Facebook tab, but away your phone and work. I would do the same, but then there would be no blog. And we don't want to live in a world where I have no blog.
MONO SUCKED. I wasn't a person for 2 weeks and I watched the entirety of FRIENDS and lost 10 pounds. Actually, who am I kidding, mono was awesome. But I did miss halloween & my friend's wedding. Ok, I haven't developed complete feelings about mono yet.
*disclaimer: I promise next month will be funnier, but this was just a boring, sad, uneventful month. Enjoy!!!!!!!
Brock Made A Thing:
My big brother Brock (aka the Modest Man) went from blogger to designer this week with the release of his shirt. You can now buy a premium, Chicago-made (support USA-made!), Japanese cotton shirt in 3 colors for 25% less of the market price with FREE shipping & RETURNS! Go now, all men under 5'9" and enjoy proper fitting clothes that will make women want to date you.
THE LAST HUNGER GAMES, I saw it TWICE it was FANTASTIC I have so many FEELINGS and THOUGHTS. 60% was close-ups of Katniss, expressionless staring off into the barren land, maybe walking. 30% was terrifying suspense resulting in terror and tiny little seat spasms on my part. 5% was people dying--EVERYONE DIES. 4% was shots of Peeta quivering. The remaining 1% was little shots of Philip Seymour Hoffman that were held a little too long because, ugh miss him so much.
I got an internship next semester at Animal Planet! Starting February 1st, I'll hopefully get to include all the fun stuff I'll be doing there. I'll do a special post about this next year but I just thought I would share now because I am SO excited! Animals + TV? Does it get better?
November Was Sad
A lot of sadness happened in November. ISIS targeted and hurt Paris, Lebanon, Syria, Turkey, etc but also left the world disheveled. As I watch the TV and listen to the media, there is so much divide and disconnect between us as people, especially the people into their political parties who use these tragedies to further their agendas. As a people, we all want to eradicate this kind of mindless terror in the 21st century. Although we all have different ideas of how to do this, I think it's important to remember that most people don't want to hurt each other. Most people are good. As I write this, the leaders of the world's most powerful countries are meeting in Paris to discuss a world-wide stand to be intentional about climate change. I think that is so cool, we will not allow ourselves to be terrorized.
Question #1: Why do people sometimes substitute "k" for 0? Like "2k15"? Why can't they just put "2015" it doesn't look any cooler?? Let me know thanks in advance.
Question #2: What do you get when you put a Guatemalan family, two suburban white families and a South African/Scottish hybrid couple in a room? My Thanksgiving this year. It basically consisted of me trying to remember 10th grade Spanish and frantically making vegan peanut butter balls (which no one ate... tip #1 don't make healthy desserts).
Question #3: In a world where we are all on juice-diets, create "safe spaces" so people can purge their feelings, #hashtag every event that happens ever and demand that our chickens were cage-free before they were murdered - WHY does Black Friday exist. Aren't we better than that by now? Why do we (and by we I mean you because I don't participate), literally hours after being "thankful" and stuffing our fat faces do Americans stampede to stores where we consume over-priced, unethical products. First of all, the consumerism in this nation is gross; material objects will never make you feel fulfilled #sorrynotsorry. Second, what's the rush? You have a month to do Christmas shopping and you can shop online! It's the 21st century, you savages!!! THIRD, use this time and money to support ethical companies! Companies like Mayamiko, Good Cloth, Fair Trade Winds, Good & Fair, Clothe Your Neighbor, Raven + Lily, Elegant Tees (employees are women freed from sex-traffiking) - even some collections of Patagonia. And of course, Modest Man. My New Years resolution is to try to only buy ethical clothing. Many of the ethical clothing stores i've researched are from the UK or Africa, why hasn't the US caught on yet? Why is buying cheap clothes that a child probably bled to make for 7 cents a day still a thing?
Don't get me wrong, I shop at Forever 21, Nordstrom and H&M on the reg, but I'm going to try really hard next year to not do that. I may not buy as many clothes or be as stylish, but I think it's worth it.
To Lighten Up...
Here's some wonderful things that happened this month that the mainstream media didn't cover:
I just discvoered Haben Girma, a deaf and blind 27-year-old daughter to Eritrean refugees and Harvard Law graduate. She was honored as a White House Champion of Change. She is incredible, definitely check her out for some motivation.
A community mosque was set on fire and no one knows who did it. But, the people of the neighborhood of Peterborough decided to raise the $80,000 necessary to repair damages. The funds were raised within a day. But they didn't stop there--they housed displaced members and gave them a temporary space to worship. The power of community!
I think everyday Clooney does the world a justice by living and being a beautiful human (and don't even get me started on the incredible Amal Clooney). But this month he did something really cool and it makes me excited because it happened in my favorite city, Edinburgh. He stopped into Social Bite to grab a sandwich and bring attention to this awesome restaurant which donates 100% of it's profits to charity. He also casually donated 1,000 pounds to the shop. What a guy.
Umm... And Can We Talk About Akon?
Yes, like the "Smack That" Akon. Why did no one talk about how he personally made it his mission to give light literally to 600 million africans though his initiative Akon Lighting Africa. Very cool.
Alright, that's all for now! See you all in December where I will elaborate on how hard it is to shop for my siblings and other first world problems.
So, you want to be trendy you say? You want people to mistake you from behind as an 80-year-old woman? You want to be a WALKING JUXTAPOSITION, YOU SAY!? Here's how you do it.
Step 1: Prepare Your Hair (emotionally)
Grey is actually a hair dye - it's a really ashy brown color. It's not like bleaching where you strip color away. It is best to start with bleached hair. I luckily just had my hair bleached in June (my hair loves to be bleached) so my hair dresser was working with close to white hair. If you have a dark hair color, CONSULT YOUR LOCAL HAIRDRESSER. It's best to go in for 2-3 sessions and lighten your hair over time. If you try to bleach it all at once, you'll murder your hair, it'll all fall out and your hairdresser will hate you. Preparing your hair could take a while, but it'll be worth it.
Step 2: Schedule the Appointment
Research hair salons. Call them and ask if anyone there has done or specializes in grey hair or bleached hair.
Step 3: Buy The Products
I was never a big product person until I started bleaching my hair. You will need the products right after you dye your hair, so make sure you buy them beforehand. Here's what I buy and and how I use them:
My hair/scalp tends is dry; I don't have greasy hair. If you have greasy hair, just don't condition your scalp. I wash my hair on a needs-be basis which tends to be twice a week. Here's what I do.
Step 4: Prepare Your Hair (physically)
This part really depends on you and your hair history. Call your hairdresser and tell them the truth about your hair history. Ask them how to prepare. They'll probably suggest you deep condition 1-2 weeks beforehand and don't use any damaging products.
Step 5: Dye Your Hair Grey
Step 6: Keeping It Grey
If you live in a sunny place, great! The sun will help keep your hair light. If you live in DC where the sun don't shine in the dead of winter, upkeep is going to be harder. Either way, make sure to follow my routine in Step 3 & do your own research! Not all hair was created equal. *BE NICE TO YOUR HAIR*
Don't brush violently. Put it in a low bun every night before you go to sleep or you will wake up with a BIRDS NEST for hair.
Happy Hair Dyeing!
Well, actually, not so happy for me. I just got diagnosed with infectious mononucleosis!!!! Which is absolute insanity. So fun though. My boyfriend came over to bring me a smoothie, took one look at me, threw the smoothie at my face, took the dog, ran away and burned my house down. What? Well he might as well have. I feel and look like a zombie.
Disclaimer: this blog was written under the influence of bengal spice tea and copious amounts of Dayquil. Proceed with caution.
Horrors (or were they!?) of Halloween Past
From the ages of 4 (when I became independant in my costume choices) through 20--I mean 12... 12, I dressed up as either Tinker-bell or Captain Jack Sparrow. I feel like you can tell a lot about someone by what they dressed up as as a child but you can tell even more about their parents. My mom and dad had to dress 6 kids up for a solid 15 years straight, so when it came to costumes, I was allowed free reign. Obviously, repeating costumes was welcomed. But when you became a fat little nugget of a child like me, fitting into those tiny little green slippers wasn't as easy as it was the year before. This is when my weight complex began. Just kidding. But really. I hate you Tinker-bell. Some of my friends had amazing costumes that were hemmed actually made sense--or even flashier: they were store bought(gasp)! My elaborate Tinker-bell costume was typically just a green pillow case cut with decorative fringes at the bottom. My Captain Jack Sparrow costume consisted of like 20 of my dad's belts and brown eyeliner scribbled all over my face courtesy of my older sister (who continued to do many things similar to this throughout my life). Taking away from this case study, whilst some parents wanted other parents to envy their costume/creativity skillz, my parents just wanted to get through the night without any mental breakdowns, get some free candy and hopefully get some blackmail material for future reference.
I have a lot of fun in the car by myself.
I spend a lot of time in the car. I commute to school, which is about 40 minutes away with normal traffic, and about 3 lightyears away in rush hour. "Rush hour" is a phrase that people in cities use to describe rush times on the roads, typically in the morning from 6-9 and the same in the evening. The Washington, D.C., however, it refers to a little pit of hell that encapsulates all of D.C. twice a day. People change during rush hour. They become very irrational. It is a fact that if everyone knew how to drive, there would be no rush hour on the beltway. IT IS A LOOP. There are no lights! Anyway, for me, though, on the rare occasion I leave the house during rush hour, it's okay. Because I've learned how to entertain myself in the car.
Here's the key to commuting: upgrade to Spotify Premium and subscribe to Freakonomics.
"Erin you're crazy" "Erin, you're mad!" "The solution can't be that easy!!" It IS, though.
On the days you're feeling tired - pick a peppy playlist. On the days you're feeling bummed - you better bet I'm blasting that Ray Charles all the way down 16th street. And for every other day, you can listen to Freakonomics, the best podcast ever made. In one episode of this podcast, I have felt more educated than I have in 14 years of schooling. I'm not kidding. You're welcome.
O C T O B E R P R O J E C T S
This month I had the pleasure of taking Lindsay & Jordan's engagement photos. Here's a few, but check out the whole set on my smugmug.
I also got to take lots of great fall photos for the Modest Man. He helps shorter guys dress well.
Check out his blog!
Here's a video I did for a startup in DC called Annexa, Inc:
(click on the picture)
I also went to Shenandoah and took some pretty pictures of the mountains and my friends.
Going to the pediatrician when you're 20.
I'm confusing to people. I have the face of a peaking 11-year-old who stores grapes in her cheeks but I have the grey hair of a 90-year old woman and am wearing a sorority t-shirt - so what am I!?
"I don't know." I replied to the woman at the front desk. She stared at me for a few more minutes in horror then asked me to sign in, because she really had to know who I was. When she looked at my name, she smiled because she remembered she knew me. Because when you go to the pediatrician when you're 20, you'll realize some things never change. Ever. Their water fountain was STILL broken. SINCE 1995.
Awwwwkward Moment oF the month
Setting: me, dying on the couch from mono, scrolling Facebook on my phone when a mom shares a post reminding other moms to check their kids candy subtly telling them that they don't mom as hard as she does.
Me: "Mom, did you check out candy when we were little to make sure it was safe."
Her: "Well of course I did"
Me: "I don't remember you ever doing that"
Her: "Well when you got older you did it on your own"
Me: "I don't remember ever checking it on my own"
Her: "Well it's your problem then"
*casually finds 7 year old razor blade lodged in back tooth*
NEXT MONTH ON THE BLOG
Probably won't be that exciting because I'll have mono for the first two weeks. BUT, having mono gives me a lot of time to catch up on Friends. I completed How I Met Your Mother in 2013 and loved it but was tired of it being compared to Friends all the time. So I decided to give an in-depth analysis at the feud and determine which one is "better" (even though I still think the two cannot be compared).
HELLO THANKSGIVING JUST A QUICK REMINDER THAT THIS EXISTS:
and with that, see you next month.
Quick question: if I write a blog, and no one is around to read it - did I really write a blog?
Just kidding! Hi Mom! No, I don't have your reading glasses, check the top your head again.
One more question: if I bought my grandma an iPad and typed in my blog into her browser and put it in her hands, would she read my blog. grandma, please!
Uh, so SEPTEMBER was awesome. Here's my summaries of some events that happened:
Kanye was just being Kanye, bro, why'd Miley have to have something to say about Nicki if the Taylor gang accepts everyone when will they accept me WOW DEMI looks good uh, Macklemore I don't know how to feel about this but I wanna moped now.
2. THE POPE
It's so funny I was just texting Franky one day and was like "come over i'm bored" and he was like "ok, I'll be there in like 5 mins" and then DC, Philly and New York went on apocalyptic shut downs but he just wanted to chill with me?
3. Donald Trump
I don't have anything to say I just thought it would be funny to give his name even MORE attention than it already gets from people who hate him but are actually making him more popular. #HUUUUUUUUUUUUGE
4. September 11
Pro tip: when you ask out a girl you really like, don't do it on the most tragic day in American history. Happy 5 years MICHAEL/sad 14 years #neverforget/happy 86th birthday grandma. ugh.
5. The Late Show with Stephen Colbert was birthed
I think there has been more host movement in late night television in the last 2 seconds than there has been in the past millennium. Now can we just get a woman in there or... What? No? Women are still stupid? Sorry. (PS congrats to Trevor Noah on the Daily Show!! At least we have a tiny littlt bit of diversity now)
The Color Run
So I decided to pay money to run, wait - what? What did I do? Why... how did they get me to do that? Oh yeah, another thing: the Color Run is a FOR-profit company! They say they donate some of the proceeds to local institutions but they are, technically, FOR PROFIT. That means I literally PAID a company $45 to mail me a t-shirt and block off a sidewalk so I could "run a 5k" and take an instagram. Don't get me wrong, I had a good time, but this is what went down:
Sunday morning, the Lord's day, the day of rest, the day of peace, my alarm screams me awake at 5am to an empty and creepy house (my parents spontaneously left, they do this) and was sick as a dog. I have chronic asthma which means whenever I get slightly sick I have residual asthma for about 500 years.
Asthma is great, really, it's so cool because it's just average enough that no one really feels bad for you as you struggle to breathe but it's just serious enough that I had to run with inhaler in hand. NOTHING screams cool like taking a couple puffs mid run.
You get there, everyone's wearing their $45 white t-shirts that are just going to get ruined. You know it's not really about exercise or running when people are there who definitely just came from McDonalds breakfast. Actually, here's a mathematical and factual rundown of people who do the Color Run:
25%: college girls who had 5k on their bucket list and are instantly regretting waking up early on a Sunday
25%: "in-shape" families who have matching Nikes and somehow have their 3-month-year old running with them (also with custom made, matching Nikes)
30%: high school girls who paid extra to get the tutu's and run the 5k in .4 seconds whilst Snapchatting/Instagramming the entire event
19%: Middle-aged people trying to loose that baby/beer-fat and for them, it's not a happy 5k
1%: really serious runners who are either running it as a morning warm-up or are plain just taking it way too seriously
Don't get me wrong, I had a good time. I inhaled a great amount of color powder that my lungs really enjoyed, I realized that I can't run a full 5k and discovered the National Harbor is actually a really cool spot (but still too much work to get to).
ON DYING MY HAIR GREY:
I woke up one day and decided that I want to transition into being an old woman. You could say I'm a age-gender. Agender. I was born one age, but inside I'm another age.
Just kidding, grey's just super trendy right now.
When I went to the the hair salon I sat next to a 90-year-old woman who was getting her grey hair dyed blonde. I was going from bleach blonde to grey. It was meta, we high-fived.
Back to School
September is a cool month because it is the height of school's excitement. It's still warm outside, everyone's skin is still sun kissed from their summer jobs/houses/vacations. No one has had the opportunity to mess up their life yet!
This was my first fall semester at American University because I transferred in last semester. Since I was abroad in Scotland this time last year, I never got to witness Freshman. Being a Freshman is a time in your life that you will never experience again. Although I've been to 3 universities, I've only been a freshman once. The cramped dorm living, crappy food, awkward bonding - it actually is horrible. Freshman, hold in there. Your classes will get harder, the weather will get colder, your roommate will get more and more annoying, and you will start to miss your dog more everyday. But you'll never be so fresh again, so soak it up.
aaaawwWkward Moment OF the month..:
When you're in Sephora and ask an employee to help you find lipstick that "won't make me look 12" and she turns out to just be someone dressed in black who did her makeup really well that day and doesn't work as Sephora at all (she still ended up helping me).
SEE YOU IN OCOTBER!
HELLO AGAIN EVERYONE*
Welcome back to my blog. Instead of writing per month this summer, I decided to squish it all into one big blog post. But don't worry, I'm not too interesting so this shouldn't take long.
* = hi mom!!!!
All the way back in the beginning of the summer, June 6th, some daring fellow agreed to marry my sister. How's it going, Chris? Holding in there?
I knew the wedding was going to be fun with the music and food and pretty decorations. But I didn't realize how overwhelming it would be to have almost everyone you love in one place. Both sides of the family and friends from all areas of life getting weird and dancing their pants off under a tent on a summer night is about as good as it gets.
some visuals (captured by the incredible Kati Rosado):
I'll keep this short, but here's a few of my favorite moments from the wedding:
1. The Eve
As MOH and general babysitter of my 28-year-old sister, I had the pleasure of sharing a bed with her the night before the wedding. In theory, this is a tender sister moment that is supposed to be filled with cry-laughing pillow-talk as we wear our green face masks at our 10pm bedtime. In reality this was me hiding the last bottle of red wine from her as the groomsmen chased bridesmaids down the halls of the hotel followed by her passing out with earplugs in around 1am.
2. The First Time In Her Dress
The first time the bridesmaids see the bride in her dress is supposed to be a very special moment (and photo op). My sister is a clean eater, workout maniac and a twig. So, naturally, her family nickname is fattie. So the moment I saw her in her dress the first thing that came out of my mouth was, "Wow, for the first time in your life, you only look a little chubby." To her, it was the sweetest thing I ever said. But not to the makeup & hair artists just stared at me with plastered smiles, wondering when would be the right time to dip.
3. The Morning After
Obviously the ceremony was gorgeous and the reception was awesome. The morning after we rented out a room in the hotel for any guests who wanted breakfast before they went home. What we didn't know, however, was that there was an Indian celebration of some sort in that room the night before. So you walk in and there's a makeshift stage in the middle of the room covered with purple tarp and hot pink tulle strung all over the walls. Chic. One by one the zombie wedding guests stumbled into the room, stuffed eggs in their mouth and disregarded cups as they went straight for the coffee pot and chugged the whole thing. Oh did I say zombie wedding guests? I meant me whoops.
This was my money-making summer. At the end of spring semester, I was fat, poor and stressed out. Now, I have money. Still working on the others.
I spent 5 weeks nannying full-time for a WONDERFUL family. There were three boys who were 8, 6 & 3 and I've known them for about three years now. (a lotta 3's)
I was on my own for a lot of this job. It's their dads house but for a few days at a time (when he had to fly home for work) I would be alone with them and had no one to laugh at them with me. So I took notes to write about my experiences in my blog AND HERE YOU GO:
THE JOURNEY TO THE VINEYARD (which isn't actually a vineyard):
Can someone teach me how to drag luggage through pebbles/other uneven surfaces without looking really high maintenance? Is there a graceful way to drag a half-broken suitcase through the dirt? If there is let me know someone please.
So, the family lives on Chappy Island which is an island about 500 feet away from the mainland of Martha's Vineyard (island inception). You have to take a ferry to get across the little bit of water (yeah, that's how excluse it is, bridges are so proletariat) and guess who got on the wrong ferry and accidentally went to MAINLAND MASSACHUSETTES?? AND - guess who got their luggage LEFT on MAINLAND MASSACHUSETTES when they turned the ferry around? HAHA - NOT ME that's for SURE. It was okay though. It was like a *~mini-cruise~* and I got about halfway through the book I was reading.
ARRIVED AT THE VINEYARD
I finally got to the house and after a lot of "you got on the falmouth ferry??? hahahahahahahaahahahaha" I brought my bags up to my room. I should've known it wasn't $25 to go across the harbor. ANYWAY - I had a gorgeous room and my own bathroom. The house is built on a hill in the middle of the woods and they have a black Jeep that I drove. Can we talk about something real quick? The "Jeep Wave"? You know, the two finger flick you do to another car coming your way that says "hey, fellow cardriverman, hope you're having a cool day. I am, of course, you know, I'm driving a jeep". Let's say in the beginning my jeep wave was a little weak with about a 50% success rate, but by the end it was so solid that I was even doing it when I wasn't in the car.
Really rich people are the only people who use "summer" as a verb.
Also: really rich people are really good at using figures-of-speech. I overheard a conversation between two walking Vineyard Vines mannequins they kept saying things like "well, when the rubber hits the road" and "close, but no cigar" and "I have a trust fund with $4 million dollars in it". So, I decided to step up my phrase-game. This is how it went:
"So, where do you go to school?"
"American University, I study film. It's a real buckets full of.. balls.."
"I see, that's in DC right? Is it a pretty political campus? Or is it more run of the mill?"
"Yes... it is like CHICKEN carnival of student politics.......everyone has word vomit about brain thoughts."
"Well, I go to Dartmouth and it costs an arm and a leg. I'd like to transfer to USC, but that's a pipe dream."
"Well you know what they say about butter, ...you've gotta work about it. .....UGH."
"Ha, ha, I didn't mean to get your goat."
MY WEEKEND WITH THE DEMON
About one week in, the dad left on a Friday to go to a wedding back in DC for the weekend.
This was my first time alone with the boys for more than a day and let me just say - SINGLE MOMS: YOU ARE SUPERHEROES.
One day, the 3-year-old, Nathan, comes inside as I'm making lunch and asks me to go help him get his bike from the woods because he was too scared to go alone. So as we're walking into the woods, he points next to a tree in the distance where his bike is and says "do you see that man? right there."
"Yeah! I see him." I play along.
"He doesn't have a face because, because the crows ate it off."
*gulp. I grabbed the bike and ran inside. He is THREE. He knows like .5 words. I asked his two older brothers when I got inside, "Did you tell Nathan about ghosts?!" They just looked at me like I'm crazy. "We didn't tell him anything! Why what did he say?" I told them and they said they didn't talk about anything like that.
So here I am, alone in a house in the woods, on an island, a nanny, alone with 3 young boys. PERFECT start to a horror movie. So the next day at the beach I tell the boy's aunt about it (who also lives on the island) and she encouraged me to keep asking him about it. She also added that there used to be Native Americans who lived on the island and perhaps he was seeing a spirit!
On the jeep ride home (100% true and real conversation):
"hey nathan, can the man come in the house?"
A THREE YEAR OLD: "No, he's too big."
"Well, is he a nice ghost?"
"No, he's mad I won't play with him."
"Well, what would he do if he got madder?"
"He would take his mouth and put it inside my mouth and eat me."
So I spent two nights alone in terror basically. A few weeks later he updated me and said the ghost is nice now, what a relief! Dodged that "getting eaten alive by a demon-ghost" bullet.
The Rest of the Summer
The other parts of the summer that weren't filled with nannying or the wedding were entirely composed of three things: real friends, the show Friends and CAVA. Cava should really pay me for how much I rep them.
- thanks to Nurit for going to Cava with me every single day and swimming in the pool
- thanks to my girlfriends who spoon fed me ice cream & watched the bachelorette after I got my wisdom teeth out
- thanks to my parents for having a more adventurous summer than me and making me want to be a cooler human
- thanks to the family I nannied for for giving me the greatest summer job deal ever.
- thanks to Michael for constantly buying me food and Casey for literally always being down for anything.
- thanks to Gatsby and Ruby for filling the gaps in the week with cuddles.
- thanks to Johnny Lohr
- & thanks to Donald Trump just b/c why not.
honestly if anyone but my mom got this far for real tweet at me your favorite emoji and I'll let you buy me Cava sometime. I barely got this far and I wrote it.
Congrats! You are going to study abroad. That is something a lot of people don't get to do and a lot of people wish they had done. So research your country/city like crazy before you leave. Make a bucket list of all the things you want to do/see. Get a good camera - make dispensable cash before you leave.
1. Buy an adapter before you leave.
You will need it in Heathrow airport when you want to text your mom telling her you are alive but all there is in the UK are European outlets and you will go crazy.
2. For European Study-Abroaders: BUY RYANAIR TICKETS NOW.
Ryan Air is the incredibly cheap and kinda sketchy airline that you will use to go to Paris and take that cliche Eiffel Tower Instagram. BUY YOUR TICKETS NOW. The sooner you buy tickets, the cheaper they will be.
3. Don't make your bed too comfortable.
My bed sucked and it was amazing. It didn't let me lay in bed all day and forced me to get out of my apartment even when I felt lazy.
4. Don't ever say "that's weird."
Say "that's different". It'll truly open up your mind to other cultures.
5. It's okay to stay in once in a while.
In the beginning, I made the mistake of pressuring myself into doing interesting stuff all the time. I felt the need to experience everything all at once and it was tiring. But as long as you are completely aware of where you are and how fortunate you are to be there, it's okay to take a personal day. Get under your covers and watch your favorite movie and eat some Ben & Jerrys. Relax and rest.
6. Buy good shampoo, conditioner & air freshener.
At first I was just like "Oh, I'll just buy the cheapest shampoo I can find. And Airwick is so much cheaper than Ferbreeze!" Never have I been so wrong in my life. All these containers will last you the entire time your there, so choose wisely. #ragrets
7. Reflect every single day.
Think back to when you were wishing you were somewhere else, or pinning european cities on your pinterest. Think back to when you felt like you were in a bubble and look around to where you are now. There will probably never be another time in your life like this. Truly unique.
8. Make friends with LOCALS.
American's are especially bad at this. Do not study abroad in a foriegn place and only hang out with Americans. Yes, they like the same stuff you do and they laugh at the same jokes. But you will regret it and you won't grow. And go do things by yourself, try to stay away from only hanging out with people you know.
9. Expand your palate.
DON'T go to restaurants they have in the States. They're not going to be the same, and it's a big waste of your time and money. Also, don't go to the same restaurant more than 5 times - try different places. Get food poisoning, throw up, choke, eat an animal body part you haven't before. Experiment!
10. Respect the country.
Another hard one for Americans. Keep in mind that you are a visitor of the country you are in. Don't litter, don't steal, don't look down. Learn about their education and healthcare systems. Ask the locals questions about their culture and engage in political conversations. Expand your mind.
have a great time, be present always, but also take lots of pictures.
PS Anyone studying abroad in Edinburgh, Scotland: read my blog posts from Fall 2014. Go to ASDA on your first day. GO TO ISLE OF SKYE. Do the 40p/month ridacard.
I had never been in a wedding before and then BOOM and I'm Maid of Honor for my only sister. I knew that this would be the second most important wedding to me (besides my own...eventually...maybe....please) and I needed to do my research. PINTEREST IS YOUR BEST FRIEND. I learned a lot of tips from family/friends but mostly from the beautiful interwebs.
I tried to be the best I could, but there were still some things I learned and would have done differently.
Here's some advice (complete with Bridesmaids gifs and photos from our wedding!) I offer to you during this wonderful time in your life:
1. Be annoying for her.
From the moment your bestie or sister gets engaged, take pictures. Take pictures of her engagement, take pictures of her ring, take pictures of her fiance. You'll only have these moments once and as MOH is is your duty to be their personal photographer. The months leading up the wedding, your bride will be glowing with excitement. Make sure she is constantly present in the moment by ensuring you are capturing it.
I took pictures of my sister's proposal, engagement pictures, snow-day pictures, shower pictures, bachelorette party pictures - all on my DSLR. Now my sister has high quality photos of all the different stages of her engagement but she didn't have to worry about taking them.
2. Family dynamics and drama are your problem, too.
It's very easy to get wrapped up in family dynamics during wedding planning. "Which cousins should be bridesmaids?" "Grandma wants you to wear... her dress..." "Dad wants a DJ but I want a band but he's paying for the wedding but I'm the BRIDE!" and on and on ....and on. This makes wedding planning go from fun to "let's elope." As MOH, it is our duty to talk to the bride and family to figure out the solutions. Carli was a very inclusive bride - so we had family doing all kinds of different jobs (and thank God - DELEGATION IS KEY.) If you are a sister/cousin, get sassy. Their your family, feel free to be mean for the bride. If you are the bride's best friend, offer the bride advice and listen to her rants.
~*Extra Tip*~ give family members jobs. My mom did hotels & guest bags. My dad did budget and decor. My aunt did the seating chart and name cards. It keeps everyone busy and involved.
But... also make sure they can handle the job.
3. Be her guest-list checker.
You'd be surprised how easy it is for some really good friends to fall through the cracks while making a guest list. So be sure to go through your bride and her fiance's Facebooks and contact lists before making your final count. Also - make a B list, but expect everyone from your A list to RSVP "yes"... because they just might.
4. Put away your pride and fold, fold, fold.
As MOH, you are the bride's little minion. Not every aspect of wedding planning is fun. So if she's stressed out about the programs 2 days before the wedding (of course, hypothetically, of course) - buckle down and design those programs. Go online, design, go to Office Depot and fold 250 programs all night with a glass of wine. It's not glamorous, but it needs to be done! This goes for anything! Let her do the fun stuff. You do the boring stuff. You are her slave.
5. Don't let your bride be a control freak.
Now, I was blessed with a very chill sister - but I've heard horror stories. Planning a wedding is so fun! But also really stressful. Force your bride to let people in when they ask "what can I do to help?" Let her give your cell phone number out to people instead of hers. Know everything and more about the wedding so that she doesn't need to be bothered.
6. Plan the Bachelorette Party early.
Girls take forever to do anything. I hosted the bachelorette party in March and sent my first email in October. Talk to your bride and make sure you get every girl she wants to invite, not the just the bridesmaids. Also, don't be afraid to plan an unusual bachelorette party! Not ever bride wants to wear a tiara and go to the beach (and not every bridesmaid can afford it! Be a nice, budget friendly MOH.) ...But some do. You do you.
7. Stop talking about the wedding!
Two days before my sister's wedding we decided to just put everything down and go play with her horses (her favorite thing to do). This is a great way to relax and actually be more present in the moment. Get your bride to just do nothing for a few hours during wedding week. Whether this a movie or a hike. It's also just a good excuse to do some best friend/sister stuff before she gets taken away from you for the rest of forever.
8. Don't let her drink (too much) the night before.
It is so tempting to get hammered after the rehearsal dinner. It's overwhelming - everyone you love is in one place. But you can't! I told my sister she was allowed ONE glass on her favorite wine. But more than that and your body won't get good sleep. Let her make up for it the next night.
9. Don't let the groom get drunk the night before.
You're not going to be able to stop him. But maybe just ease him. And sneak over to your brother's room across the hotel hallway (where he's making the groom take shots) and steal their whiskey.
11. Don't let her talk to anyone who she sees regularly for more than 3 minutes.
One of the things that stressed my bride out the most was talking to people during the reception. She was afraid she wouldn't get to talk to everyone, and those who she needed to talk to she wouldn't get to. If you see her talking to a neighbor, someone she works with or a geographically close relative, interrupt them after 3 minutes. WEDDINGS GO BY FAST. She'll be grateful for your intervention.
13. Make her drink her drink.
Between constant conversations and eating/dancing, my sister never even had time to get drunk at her own wedding! Make your bride/groom take a couple shots and make sure they always have their favorite drink in their hand. Force them to drink it! You'll be amazed at how quickly the reception goes by.
14. Let her hang out with her fiance.
My final tip is an important one! Let your bestie/sister hang out with her future husband. Leave them alone! It was hard for me because my sister lived at home with me until the wedding. They are getting married now so they need to spend a lot of time together. My sister's now husband is great and involved me in everything (I even picked out the ring with him!) but he didn't have to be. This is their marriage and their wedding.
I hope these tips can help you have the best wedding planning experience ever. Be present and enjoy!
Let me preface this blog post by letting you know that I'm really drugged up.
Like I'm hearing colors. I finally understand basic algebra. I truly know who let the dogs out.
... When it says "do not exceed one dose of Claritin every 24 hours" DO NOT EXCEED ONE DOSE.
Have you ever noticed that it's really hard to have a substantial conversation whilst eating Chipotle? I tend to just take a bite and stare. Bite. Stare. Swallow. Rip back some tin foil.
Last night I had a dream that I asked Bruce Jenner for a hair tie. He took a deep breath and pulled his pony tail out and handed me his hair tie. He symbolically whispered, "I don't need this... anymore..."
Ok, let's get into it. MY APRIL WAS BETTER THAN YOURS. Just kidding. Well, not really. April really sucked for some people, like the guy who designed Hillary Clinton's 2016 presidential campaign logo:
“I think the Hillary logo is really saying nothing,” said Scott Thomas, the design director for Barack Obama’s 2008 presidential campaign and who later worked on the Whitehouse.gov website’s redesign. “It’s just a red arrow moving to the right.”
you hit it on the nose, Scott.
The kids call this a "Sweerrrve!"
I just discovered GIPHY.com. So brace yourselves.
Manfriend's Super Big Surprise Party BASH
One of my vast array of many skills is keeping secrets reallll secret. Like this one time I was going to throw a 21st surprise party for my boyfriend and the SECOND person I invited on the Facebook event was him!!! This was followed by even more self-inflicted embarrassment as I cried real tears covered up by desperate laughing/heaving and told everyone I knew the story. Everyone laughed with me!butreallyatme. BUT WHO IS LAUGHING NOW? You see, after he found out about the "SUPER SECRET SHH MICHAEL CAN'T KNOW SURPRISE PARTY!!!" (which was the real-life Facebook event name) he didn't suspect it when I actually threw him a real surprise party! Who's the idiot now!? He didn't suspect it all - especially since his birthday was on a Tuesday. But I don't got no tiiiiime, to party on the weekend... got the club goin' up on Tuesday, amiright?
Awwkward MoMenT of the mOnth
I accidentally cut off my professor while driving to her class.
Eye contact was made.
This month Marlee In The Mixx released their latest video "First Flight To Alaska"! I produced the video and my brother, Casey, produced the music and Miciah (the guitarist & producer for the band) mastered the music. As always, MITM is a blast to work with. They are so positive and they genuinely have so much fun together. Oh, and they are incredibly talented musicians. Enjoy this original piece from local DC band, Marlee In The Mixx:
I also did a little side-project this month. My sister is an occupational therapist and has been working with Nick, a 20-year-old with autism, for the past 4 years. As he is transitioning this year from high school to adulthood, a lot of changes will happen. When he turns 21 the government will basically cut him off from assistance. So I decided to do a short piece on wonderful Nick and inform people a little bit about what Autism is:
SPRAY TANNING FROM HELL
Sorry, a lot happened in April. One of my Maid of Honor duties is being the Bride's lil bi-otch (just kidding but not really at all sorry for the language mom). This includes "go on a spray tan trial run with mee!!!!!!"
So at like 10am on a misty, 50-degree day we walk into PALM BEACH TAN which smells like SPF & Botox. After they took my dignity, the lady gave me lotion. *ew you look like a potato* she thought and then said: "Put this all over your body before you go in."
I take the little bottle of lotion and she leads me into a closet-like room with a big metal machine that kinda looks like a time machine. She proceeds to step into the VERSAPRO and models different positions I stand in. Honestly I was too distracted by thinking "this will be so good in my blog" to pay attention. But who needs directions?
She leaves, closing the door behind her and said "gewwwwd lack." Then I could've sworn I heard a cackle from the hallway. I turn to the machine and greet it... should I bow? *starts bowing* no don't bow that's stupid... I've never felt so insecure around a machine. THEN IT STARTED TALKING TO ME I'm not even kidding this voice started coming from the machine telling me what to do. "Welcome to the VersaPro" she said condescendingly.
I step inside Versa and she immediately starts saying things. All I can remember is the front desk lady saying "hold your breath when it sprays you" so obviously I inhaled when it sprayed me.
Whatever, I got tan. I think the best part of the experience was explaining to everyone I saw for the next week that I got a spray tan. That was really fun. So fun.
I'm bad at conclusions. I also really have to go study for an exam I have in 1 1/2 hours.
I'll see you guys in May.
Erin is from one of the greatest places in the world: Silver Spring, Maryland.